There are countless thousands of non-custodial parents in the US, Canada, and several other countries who were unaware of how family law works until they were caught up in its web. Many lose access to their children (some entirely). We have learned that our cases are not isolated, but are actually the norm in some jurisdictions such as Pennsylvania, where children see their father half as much as their mother, often much less in more problematic counties (such as Northampton). Perverse financial incentives by the federal government have created a class of parents who are enslaved to the state and their former partner: the children used as an excuse to violate their civil rights. Many of these parents are silenced by court orders, violation of which leads to protective orders and separation from their children. Today’s family courts are closed to the public, with no accountability for the judges or attorneys to follow the laws. The superior court has stood by idle and allowed illegal support orders to stand, refusing to rule on family law cases in the majority of situations, then sealing the records and hiding from public scrutiny.
The end result is the destruction of the nuclear family and poor outcomes for our children who are caught up in the middle of this conflict.
And why? Because we have a system created by attorneys under the guise of acting in the bests interests of the children, which in fact serves only to profit from the conflict in divorce and separation.
Reform must start at the state level. HB1397 in Pennsylvania is a start, but it must be pulled out of the Judiciary committee as attorneys will not stop a source of revenue for themselves and their peers. Please call your representative and tell them that the war on families must stop, and to push through HB1397. Many states have moved on from the outdated “one side takes all” model, instead moving to what is best for the children in the majority of cases, 50/50 equal shared parenting.
HB1397 and most shared parenting legislation has provisions to take this into account. Allegations should be substantiated and not simply raised during a contentious divorce to secure custody.
This is simply untrue in the vast majority of cases. Any non-custodial parent who is fighting to this degree to achieve shared parenting is not doing it without cause.
This is outdated and a myth repeated in certain circles–but entirely unfounded. The science shows that the best parenting in a divorce is shared parenting. The damage to the children is not the physical location of their upbringing, but the level of conflict between the parents. The current system creates financial rewards for the custodial parent to foster conflict. Shared parenting will instead encourage involvement from both parents.